The Difference Between Good Change and Bad Change
Change is inevitable—it shapes our lives, challenges us, and allows us to grow. But here’s the truth not everyone talks about: not all change is good. What feels exciting or liberating in the moment can sometimes lead us astray, while the hardest, most uncomfortable transformations can guide us toward our greatest growth.
So how do we know the difference? How can we discern when to embrace change and when to pause, reflect, and step back? As Ecclesiastes 3:1 reminds us, “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens.” It takes wisdom, patience, and faith to navigate the ever-shifting seasons of life.
Let’s dive deeper into why some change feels good but isn’t, why some change feels bad but is necessary, and how to discern the difference when the lines are blurred.
When Bad Change Feels Good
Not all that glitters is gold. Some changes feel exciting, even empowering, in the moment—but over time, they can erode our values, relationships, or well-being.
Think about the pursuit of progress for the sake of progress. Whether it’s chasing a promotion, buying into trends, or rushing into decisions because "everyone else is doing it," this kind of change can seem appealing on the surface but leave us feeling empty in the end.
Here are some signs that a change might not be as good as it seems:
- It Compromises Your Values: If a change forces you to act against your beliefs or integrity, it’s likely not worth the cost. True transformation should align with who you are at your core.
- It’s Driven by Impulse: Changes made on a whim or in moments of high emotion often lack foresight. Ask yourself, Am I acting out of impatience, fear, or comparison?
- It Prioritizes Quick Results Over Long-Term Fulfillment: Many bad changes offer instant gratification at the expense of deeper satisfaction. They might feel good initially but rarely lead to lasting joy.
Example:
Think of the story of the prodigal son (Luke 15:11-32). His decision to leave home, take his inheritance, and live lavishly likely felt liberating at first. But that change, driven by impulse and the allure of freedom, led to regret and brokenness. It wasn’t until he returned home—humbled but wiser—that he experienced true transformation.
“There is a way that appears to be right, but in the end it leads to death.” (Proverbs 14:12)
When Good Change Feels Bad
On the flip side, some of the best changes in life are the hardest to go through. Growth requires discomfort. Leaving your comfort zone, breaking unhealthy habits, or letting go of what no longer serves you can feel painful in the moment but often leads to something greater.
Here are some signs that a difficult change might actually be good:
- It Challenges You to Grow: Growth is never easy, but it’s worth it. If a change pushes you to develop new skills, face fears, or become more resilient, it’s a sign of positive transformation.
- It Aligns With Your Long-Term Values: Even if it’s uncomfortable, good change resonates with your core beliefs and the life you’re trying to build.
- It Brings Clarity Over Time: Good change often brings peace—not immediately, but as the dust settles, it begins to feel “right” in your heart.
Example:
Think about the discomfort of ending a toxic relationship or starting a new chapter in your life, like moving to a new city or beginning a new job. These changes might feel scary or overwhelming at first, but they often pave the way for growth, healing, and opportunity.
As Romans 8:28 reminds us, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”
How to Discern Good Change from Bad Change
Discerning between good and bad change isn’t always straightforward. Life rarely presents us with black-and-white answers, and sometimes, it’s not until we’re further along the journey that we understand the full picture. However, there are guiding principles that can help us make wiser decisions in the moment:
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Pause Before Acting:
When faced with a decision, give yourself time to reflect. Hasty decisions often lead to regret. Take a moment to pray, journal, or speak with someone you trust. “Be still, and know that I am God.” (Psalm 46:10) -
Examine Your Motivations:
Are you seeking change out of fear, pride, or a desire to impress others? Or are you pursuing transformation for growth, healing, or alignment with your values? -
Seek God’s Guidance:
Invite God into the process. Trust Him to guide your steps, even when the path isn’t clear. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.” (Proverbs 3:5-6) -
Look for Affirmation:
Good change often comes with confirmation. It could be encouragement from others, a growing sense of peace, or unexpected doors opening. Pay attention to these signs—they’re often God’s way of nudging you forward.
Embracing the Lessons of Change
Ultimately, every change—good or bad—has something to teach us. Even mistakes and missteps can lead to growth if we’re willing to learn from them. As we navigate life’s twists and turns, let’s remember that God is with us in every season, shaping us for His purpose.
Reflection Questions:
- Is there a change in your life that feels uncomfortable but might be leading to growth?
- Are you holding onto something that feels good in the moment but isn’t serving your long-term values?
- How can you invite God into the changes you’re facing today?
Change is Powerful
Change is powerful, but it’s not always easy to navigate. By pausing, seeking wisdom, and staying true to your values, you can discern the difference between change that leads to growth and change that leads you astray.
This week, challenge yourself to embrace transformation thoughtfully and intentionally. Trust that even in the discomfort, God is working for your good.
Here’s to a week of meaningful growth and wise decisions—because the right kind of change can truly transform your life.